Norman Vincent Peale once said, “Attitude is more important than facts.” We can control what we feel if we change our attitudes. True, there may be physical reasons why a person tends to be paranoid. Perhaps they would benefit from medication or a good herbal supplement. (Paranoia tends to go along with depression, and St. John’s Wort can really help a person get into a better all around mood.) Having a clear feeling about others is essential for success in every aspect of life. Do I feel like my spouse secretly disdains me? Do I worry about how people in the store are evaluating my looks? Do I assume this prospective client already doesn’t like me? All of these thoughts can be reversed if I only make the effort. I can choose to believe that my spouse loves me, at least until he tells me otherwise. I can choose to believe the people in the store think I look fine, or more likely aren’t even paying any attention to me. And I can assume this prospective client has a good feeling about me. So, how do I go about renewing my assumptions? How can I convince myself that others like me and want to do me right in business and social matters?

  1. I can build self esteem. Experts might not always agree on the best way to do this, but gaining competency at some skill usually helps. I can take an inventory of everything that’s admirable about me. Why wouldn’t people like me and want the best for me?
  2. I can start now to eliminate worry from my self-talk and habits. I can pay attention to little negative attitudes and get rid of them.
  3. I can ask a trusted friend to tell me my blind spots. If we sense that people are responding negatively to us, maybe we have some quirky habits that irritate others. A good friend might be willing to fill me in on these if I can accept a little constructive criticism. And then, I can act with resolve to change these unknown, irritating habits. Often, however, changing my assumptions about others is a simple choice. I can choose to turn my paranoid around into a hopeful expectation of respect and courtesy. References: Canfield, Jack. The Success Principles: How to Get From Where You Are to Where You Want to Be. Peale, Norman Vincent. The Power of Positive Thinking Barbara Wood is a writer and educator living with her family in the Missouri Ozarks.